I recently traveled by commercial airliner to "The Big Easy", aka New Orleans, Louisiana. From Missouri that required two airline flights, a little less than two hours each. Flight One, the woman seated next to me removes a cosmetic bag from a larger bag, extracts a bottle from that bag and lathers her hands with lotion; one of those pungent, fruity/sweet blends of pomegranate and overripe melon that is a headache inducing runner-up to the scorched brown sugar and something musky hand lotion scent that is far too popular. Either of these lotions may smell lovely while shopping in a multi-acre open air market on a cool fall day in New Hampshire, but within the confines of an aerodynamic, pressurized metal hull filled with persons in an array of hygienic states, those scents are headache-explosions-in-waiting.
K: I see cars!!
K: I see our house!!!
K: I do!!
K: See? There it is!!
Mom: Okay Kyle. Where is it?
K: Right there!! Next to that one!!!
K: There's a pool!!!
A half a minute goes by before Kyle erupts with:
Mom: There will be drinks and snacks on the plane.
K: I smell pizza. I want PIZZA!!
Mom: Kyle, don't yell. There are other people on the plane.
And so Kyle listened to his mom and stopped yelling - and began singing in that non-melodic, make-it-up-as-you-go way children are so adept at:
"Know what I want to eat? Pizza!! Yum! Yum!
"Know what I want to eat?? Pizza!! Yum! Yum!
"Know what I want to eat??? Pizza!! YUM! YUM!
At this point the father interjects:
Dad: "Love you buddy. Love your singing, but---"
and in unison with Mom:
"Not everyone wants to hear it."
Silence for 9 seconds, then,
K: "Know what I want to eat?! PIZZA!! Yum, Yum!!"
Dad: Kyle, that's enough.
Just then a flight attendant rolled the beverage cart to a stop.
FA: "Something to drink? Pretzels?"
K: PRETZELS!! YEA!!
And a new song was born with a different food as its theme and once more Kyle was told to stop singing. When the pretzels and Coke were finally in hand he did stop but kept up the rhythm of his song with both feet against the back of my seat.
Longest One Hour and Fifty-Eight Minute Flight I've ever been on. I can't complain though. I had to be in Kyle's life for less than two hours. His parents, on the other hand....